Creating A Space For Mom and Dad
Appropriate boundaries for our bedrooms allow us to create spaces where we can snuggle, sleep, have sex, and talk without being interrupted.
We’ve moved 26 times in 45 years, and I’ve done my best to make a bedroom sanctuary for the two of us in each location. We need a place to shut out the world, focus on each other, and spend time alone.
Bedroom Boundaries
- Consider where you put your bed. Position your bed on a wall not shared with a child’s room.
- Knock before entering. Teach the kids to knock and ask permission to enter if the door is shut.
- Add a lock to the door. You may not need to use it, but a lock is handy on the door and will set your mind so that you won’t be interrupted.
- Use privacy curtains. Thinking someone might see into the room disturbs the sense of privacy we want to create.
- Declutter the room. Too much furniture, dirty clothes, or office work spread around the bedroom distracts from the sense of peace and calm we want in our bedrooms.
- Teach the kids to sleep in their beds. It’s hard to focus on your spouse when the kids are there. Keep your bedroom and bed a sacred space for the two of you.
- Train the pets to sleep in another room. Pets can seem like a third person in a bed meant for two. At least have someplace for the pets where you want some privacy.
- Turn phones on Do Not Disturb. Our immediate family is on a list, so they are the only ones who can call between certain hours in an emergency.
- Create a true oasis. Change the sheets regularly, vacuum the floor, and add a chair, a private spot to talk if possible.
It’s important to teach kids that mom and dad need alone time. Establishing appropriate boundaries about our space as a couple teaches kids to honor us and respect marriage as a sacred relationship between husband and wife.
Honor your marriage and guard the sacredness of sexual intimacy between wife and husband. ~ Hebrews 13:4 MSG
